Believing in yourself is about knowing and aligning with your highest idea of who you are and why you are here. The times I’ve experienced an unshakeable belief in myself are when I’m most connected to my purpose and feel that I am free to act on it. However, there was a time when I allowed my self-belief to be eroded by the opinions, judgements, and values of others, or what I perceived them to be. Focused on what I was doing, who I was doing it with and for, and what I was getting in return, I lost what was essential to me; what I thought of myself and who I knew myself to be.
During times of transition or uncertainty, when we’re feeling our most vulnerable, many people question who they are &/or their reason for being, describing themselves as feeling ‘lost’. This feeling is one of being disconnected from our Soul’s purpose. Ultimately, belief in yourself and connection to your purpose in life are intertwined… each needs the other to thrive.
When I say I believe in myself, it means being a stand for the possibility of Who I Am independent of my ‘story’. It doesn’t make excuses or blame my childhood, my parents, or the economy. Werner Erhard described it as standing on nothing… but your word.
When you believe in yourself, you do what’s needed when it’s needed, regardless of how you feel. You don’t think about whether it’ll win you any brownie points and you’re not concerned with what other people are doing or what they think or feel about what you’re doing. It’s about self-respect, personal honour, your own ‘Code of Ethics’, being someone you can count on, someone you – and others – can look up to. When you believe in yourself, you exude confidence and charisma, and it’s these qualities which attract others and opportunity your way!
So, where do you find self-belief? In those moments of nothingness; in the thoughts you or I have of something we could do which feels good to imagine… and then acting on it. When we avoid taking the right action, resist what calls to us, give up, or give in, it is either a sign of a lack of self-belief or eventually contributes toward it. It shuts down rather than opens up possibility. And it can be what causes others to doubt, question or ignore us.
No one else can give you self-belief or self-respect because they come from the Self. Others can recognise your worth, but you must own it! When you believe in yourself, you could be doing the most amazing things, and no one else need know. You can be ‘famous’ in your own little corner of life. Alternately, no amount of fame or success matters if it is done for you to be accepting of yourself or worthy of your own self-belief. You could spend a lifetime seeking the approval of others. Or, you could just get on with your life, making the unique contribution you have to make in the world, being true to who you really are, and experiencing the joy that comes with that.
Inner Sense No. 28 | March 2012 – updated June 2019